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« Unexpected Brilliance | Main | Are You Picking Your Battles or Just Surrendering? »



Thank you for this lovely article. You have taken a very complex subject, and made it very easy for parents to implement.


Great information, thank you! Yes, often times too much praise gets to sound sickening sweet, and we all know what too much of a good thing can do! I will be trying the describing without judging this week.

Thanks for the post, and welcome back!!


I was a bit thrown by the title of this post, but as I read it, I was pleasantly surprised at how good the advice is. Dads especially, need to hear this. So many of us want to fix things, show our kids how to do it, and other behaviors that make perfectly good sense to us, but aren't the best way to go. I am going to link to this post in my blog,
Thank you.

Mama of 2

Thanks for this post. It's a good article and I will put what you have mentioned here to good use with both my 9 year old and 19 month old.


Glad you're back, great post.


This technique is described in the first chapter of "Transforming the Difficult Child," by Howard Glasser and Jennifer Easley. I haven't gotten much past the first chapter but have tried to implement the technique, and it IS hard. It's hard not to praise and it's hard not to judge. But, we're trying to see if it makes a difference in behavior. If anyone has ever (or will ever) read the book, my husband and I find the video game analogy (comparing video games and parents - very effectively) hilarious.
Spartan Fan

Laura S.

Spartan Fan, I haven't read "Transforming the Difficult Child." I'll have to look into that one!

What I described in this post is non-directive play therapy, which was developed by Virginia Axline. I use this with my clients, and I've been amazed as to how effective it is. I've seen clients with severe behavioral problems turn into fairly cooperative children after being exposed to this treatment for only 1 hour a week for several weeks!

Peggy S.

Very helpful post - now I'm actually thinking more consciously about how I praise my toddler. You're ahead of the curve! Just read this article today re Dweck's study:


This is great information, and is very useful in my essay.

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